Double meaning. (?)

  • Me: *nakahawak sa bag niya kahit san siya pumunta*
  • Him: Ba't mo ba hinahawakan yung bag ko?
  • Me: *tumawa lang*
  • Friend: May ikukwento ako sa'yo..
  • Friend: Ba't ka ba nakahawak sa bag niya?
  • Me: Eh kasi baka makawala (tapos maligaw) siya eh.
  • Friend: (di niya tinuloy yung dapat niyang ikukwento kasi kailangan namin ng privacy kaso nakahawak ako sa bag niya) *naunang naglakad*
  • Me: *binitawan yung bag niya para makausap ng maayos si friend*
  • Me to him: Wag kang mawawala ah.
I’ve always been told how I would look much better if I was slimmer. Of course I’ve thought about losing weight every so often that I would sometimes make a new lifestyle plan (i.e. eating only half cup of rice every meal, working out, etc) but not being able to do it religiously. But then there are times I would ponder how I don’t want to be what they want me to be. I mean, yes, I want to be in good shape but how am I supposed to know if people like me for me? I don’t want people to befriend me, admire me or even date me just because of how I look.
I WANT PEOPLE TO LIKE ME GENUINELY BECAUSE I AM ME. NOTHING MORE, NOTHING LESS.

I’ve always been told how I would look much better if I was slimmer. Of course I’ve thought about losing weight every so often that I would sometimes make a new lifestyle plan (i.e. eating only half cup of rice every meal, working out, etc) but not being able to do it religiously. But then there are times I would ponder how I don’t want to be what they want me to be. I mean, yes, I want to be in good shape but how am I supposed to know if people like me for me? I don’t want people to befriend me, admire me or even date me just because of how I look.

I WANT PEOPLE TO LIKE ME GENUINELY BECAUSE I AM ME. NOTHING MORE, NOTHING LESS.

Kanina nung bumaba ako after ng klase tinawag ako ng mga ka-committee ko para itanong kung tuloy ba yung agenda namin. Habang kinakausap nila ako nakita ko sa peripheral vision ko na tumigil ka sa gilid na para bang hinihintay mo ‘kong matapos para sabay tayong bumaba. Masaya na sana ako kaso naalala ko na yung babaeng masa harap ko yung pakay mo. Ang drama ko pero masakit na ginamit mo pa yung pangalan ko nung tinanong ka ng mga kaibigan mo kung bakit ka nandun. Naiinis ako sa sarili ko kasi naiinis ako sa’yo, when in fact wala ka namang ginagawang masama. Naiinis din ako kasi kahit ganyan ka, di ko mapigilang kiligin sa mga maliliit na bagay na ginagawa mo.

Lalo na pag wala kang payong ako ang takbuhan mo. Kahit basang-basa na yung kalahati ng katawan ko, hinihiling ko pa rin na sana lagi kang walang payong para share tayo.

Clandestine Thoughts turned 3 today!

Wowowowow. I don’t even remember when I made this account. This was my second account tho. I’m not active anymore but since my email reminded me, I want to thank every single on of you for 3 years. Especially to those who were with my in my first years. Those were the Tumblr best days, man. Also, to Daddy David Karp for reminding me that yesterday’s my blog’s birthay. Tumblr and the people in it will forever have a place in my heart.

Clandestine Thoughts turned 3 today!

Wowowowow. I don’t even remember when I made this account. This was my second account tho. I’m not active anymore but since my email reminded me, I want to thank every single on of you for 3 years. Especially to those who were with my in my first years. Those were the Tumblr best days, man. Also, to Daddy David Karp for reminding me that yesterday’s my blog’s birthay. Tumblr and the people in it will forever have a place in my heart.

NP: Speak Now Playlist

So much feels.

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I haven’t got excited as much as 5SOS going here (no exact date yet) for the Red Tour Manila until yesterday, which is a month away.

Up to now I still can’t grasp the fact that I was able to buy a ticket before it totally got sold out in less than an hour. My seat’s to far away from the stage, but listen, IT’S A FREAKING TAYLOR SWIFT CONCERT, I DON’T CARE! I’ve been dying to see her live ever since I became a Swiftie and of course I’ll do anything to meet her personally.

I’ve been looking through sites that can help me on getting in to Club Red and I’m pretty sure they’re all accurate because it says the same thing.

I’m fine with spending a lot because I still have money left from my birthday and I’m not going alone (my bestfriend Banch and her sister is coming with me) which means I have someone to share the expenses with. Hurrah! The problem though is that I need a reasonable excuse to go out. I can’t ask permission from dad saying “Can I go out to buy things for the concert?” which will basically land to a big no. I still have to think this through.

I wish everything goes as planned. If not everything, I hope something better comes out of it. I AM SO PUMPED!

It’s a crime to put my hopes up, but I definitely can’t wait to meet this lovely blonde-lady. For now.. this is all I have.

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Things that consume my time this Summer:

  • Fangirling. Yes, don’t hate me for this but I’ve been having a love and hate relationship with One Direction and Taylor Swift recently, and now that I just got in this new fandom called 5SOSfam, I’m definitely up for wasting my time watching their YouTube videos, witnessing their life as they go on tour around the world, and of course, fooling around with other fangirls on Twitter. I’m enjoying this a lot, I swear.
  • Fanfics. Mmm-hmm, you read that right! I bet I already told you guys ages ago that I don’t really fancy reading on a gadget. I prefer physical copies and the word “Wattpad” irritates me so much. But hey, some things are worth getting teary-eyed for due to the brightness of the screen. My friend recommended some good One Direction inspired fanfics and I’m glad I took her advice. Not to mention, I am deeply falling in love with One Direction more and more because of this. I DON’T REGRET ANYTHING.
  • Sleep. Since I’ve been sleeping late, I’ve been waking up late too so technically I’ve been spending the day asleep. You’re probably wondering (or not) why I’ve been sleeping late, I don’t have to explain. It’s stated above. Lol.

Well, I think that’s all beside the usual (eating). Me and my mom started taking long walks every morning before April but then we stopped recently because her alarm doesn’t go off in time (and probably because she’s too lazy to get up at 5 like I do). Sometimes I also am thankful we don’t do them anymore when we could just workout here at home and just get the best out of it. So yeah, that’s probably how the rest of my Summer vacation will go. Well, unless my dad allows me to hangout with my friends and stuff normal teenagers do. Lmao.

Hi.

May followers pa rin ako dito. Weird.

Finding my blog interesting is not part of the equation why they’re still following me though maybe some of them do that’s why they followed me in the first place. But now that I’m inactive, given the fact that it’s Summer, I presume they still follow me because they are also inactive. I don’t even know why I’m blogging about this. Lmao.

Anyway, hi! I just reckoned I miss Tumblr that’s why I’m here. Again.

How are you all doing?

I love the way it felt when you were sitting next to me the other day, it’s like electric current running through my veins. I cannot help but feel tingly when you call me “babe” even if you were only joking. I was screaming inside my head when I took I first photo together. I’m glad you let me.

I will always remember that moment when I helped you wash the dishes. It was like we’re family, like husband and wife helping each other out with the household chores. I cannot explain how I am so into you when the other half of me doesn’t want to fall. I don’t want to take risks.. I guess not yet.

But "every moment with you is a moment I treasure."

I can’t get you out of my head. The memory of you holding the umbrella over me at the back of my head still rings in and makes me giggle. You’re so cute, you really don’t know how to share an umbrella with someone.

That small walk to school was the one of the best 5 minutes of my life.